I get up early with the intention to go to church, and suddenly I heard the rain. Now, I’m torn in between. As always. Will I go today or not? Five more minutes, I say. And I’ll sleep the “extra” time away. 5, 10, 15.. My body and my spirit are battling. The decision lies in me on which side I will give victory. It’s been always like this. A constant struggle. A constant battle.
Just yesterday, I know that I need to finish a journal as part of the training. But I gave in to the temptation to watch a movie, which I could have done afterwards. The result, as expected, I wasn’t able to reflect on this chapter. And I’m catching up. Which is really my priority? Why did I give in so easily? My mind justifies my decision that I know I had spent most of my time on church activities this weekend, by far. Excuses! I know that I must do it because I’m on training. And I want to be successful on this training; I have to get my spirit back on track.
The examples above are what I’ve been trying to do. But those are only two out of the many things I’m always torn in between – refusing to endure, refusing to persevere. A bottle of beer. Hard rock music. Dressing way too sexy. Being late and overtime to compensate. All those comprises... Oh, how I always refuse hard work in the spiritual arena. Christian living is really hard, I must admit.
Compromises are the easiest way out; yet are the ones with the worst consequences. Even worldly wisdom suggests that. The most dangerous safe is playing safe. Compromise is divided loyalty. And His Word warns us of this. Be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a person with divided loyalty is as unsettled as a wave of the sea that is blown and tossed by the wind. (v.6) Compromise is still disobedience. By not doing anything, we are still not following Him. Disobedience is not only when we do the opposite things but also in being in middle ground. This compromise or disobedience is also divided loyalty, which eventually results to failure. Even this is proven in other areas of our lives, especially in our business and relationships.
I believe that God is calling to my mind the compromises I have gotten myself into. And that I must endure rather than escape. I am with the wisdom that first, I must accept that I have a cross to bear, like Christ. This cross represents the troubles I encounter every day and the temptations because of my sinful nature. Temptation comes from our on desires, which entices us and drags as away. (v.14). Second, by acknowledging this fact, I must also bear in mind that my cross—the troubles and temptations, will make me grow in faith. When troubles come your way, consider it as an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow (v.2-3) The weight of my cross then is proportional to my spiritual growth, if I responded according to His Word. And third, yes there will always be a battle but in the end, we are convicted of our victory in Christ over evil.
In following Jesus I must not compromise, but I must endure. To endure is to continue to live through hardship or adversity. I must follow Christ who never changes. God never changes or casts a shifting shadow. (v.17) I am holy, because He is holy and that I must refuse to let the world corrupt me (v.27)
For every trouble, God has a promise. And for this, His Word says, God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. (v.12)